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You can accept it every now and then however it’s occuring with more frequency as of late. Everytime you go looking for your spouse, you can’t find them. At least not right away. What’s going on?

It happened again; this time right in the middle of dinner.  You were in conversation with your spouse making plans for the weekend when their cell phone started ringing. It didn’t escape your notice that your significant other kept anxiously looking at the phone before it even rung.

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Your suspicions that your spouse is cheating are getting stronger. The problem is there’s no evidence to back up those suspicions. None as far as you can see.  

Unfortunately you have a bad feeling that your spouse maybe cheating on you. There’s just one problem.  You have no evidence.

Yes your instincts are telling you something is wrong but there is nothing really to back it up. All the physical signs of an extramarital affair that you’ve read and heard about don’t exist. There has been no change in the marriage relationship. Anything that seems out of place has been easily explained. Sometimes before you can even confront your spouse, you provide the answer to your own concerns in such detail that you feel it would be ludicrous to go any further.

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What is one of the reasons why an extramarital affair hurts so much? Because there is no on off switch for our feelings. 

In his article, Annoying Behavioural Patterns, James Walsh gets to the crux of the marital relationship when he states, “It is only after marriage that one understands what real loving, caring and sharing is all about.”

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There are no good options when you find out your spouse is cheating. However that hasn’t stopped people from turning it into a game and upping the stakes. 

After months of self denial, you have finally accepted the reality. Friends who cared about you tried to warn you but you dismissed them as nothing more than busybodies whose relationships was so suspect that they had nothing better to do with their “miserable” lives than interfere in your relationship. 

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Any relationship is bound to have its share of arguments. That’s life. However when one spouse is cheating, these arguments can sometimes increase in frequency and intensity. There maybe a couple of reasons for this.

Every marriage contains its share of ups and downs. Let’s face it. Two people living under the same roof sharing and learning the most intimate details about each other often takes superhuman effort. Whether both personalities are strong or one is more dominant than the other is beside the point. Constant contact has the ability to create an environment that in one minute is love personified and in the next tension filled to the point of unbearable.

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It requires a definite quantity of ingenuity to carry on an affair. For this reason you must be very careful to ensure that same ingenuity does not brand you as the heavy.

It started with the funny looks. You would catch your spouse staring at you sometimes in a way that was not only unfamiliar but downright uncomfortable.

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