How To Listen So Your Teen Will Talk
One of the most precious gifts you can give your teenager is a good ear. When your teens know that you are level headed and not about to jump on them if they mention the word ‘tatoo,’ ‘boyfriend’ or ‘night club,’ they will be more open to share with you what really is going on inside them.
Here are a few tips on just how to be a good listener and develop a great relationship with your teenager.
1. Ask them their opinion.
Many times teenagers feel they are not listened to because their opinions carry no weight in a conversation. Be sure to allow your teenager to express their opinions and respect their ideas and dreams.
If your teenager comes home from school and tells you they want to move out of home, instead of throwing a wobbley, going crazy and shouting at them, ask them why they want to move out? Do they feel you are not giving them enough independence? If so, explain why you have set boundaries in your home that they may feel limit their independence. Are they being influenced by friend that has recently moved out?
Or lets say your teenager girl tells you she has started going on the contraceptive pill. Instead of going crazy and shouting at her, ask her why? Talk to her about sex, you may not feel comfortable with this, but obviously she went on the pill for a reason, so I am guessing she already know all about sex! But it would be good for her to know that you are there as a support, even if you may not agree on sex before marriage, at least your teen is taking responsibility for their actions.
2. Show some unconditional love.
This is easier said then done! Your teenagers will definitely have ideas that differ from your own. But without love, your teen will not be as open with you and will not be willing to share as much of their personal lives and feelings.
For example, if they have career goals you are not supportive of, really try to listen to their reasoning and be open to new ideas. Your children do not have to follow in your footsteps to be happy and successful. Today there are so many new and exciting opportunities that you probably never had. Do limit them if they want to try out a few!
Here’s to you and your teen building a rock solid relationship!
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Tags: activities, bored, conversation, help with tee, listen, listening, parent, parenting, talk, teenager
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